Slow Modem John:

I haven’t had so much fun since the day… Well, probably since I
climbed Half Dome. I got that wonderful sense of satisfaction created
when you accomplish something you were afraid might be difficult or
dangerous, but is actually a total cakewalk, and a certain sense of
pride knowing you did some good in the world, without being punished
for it. What a rush.

My team (my brother and I) approached our first target on Easter
Sunday; Our Lady of Guadalupe Catholic Church (pictured). We cruised
the parking lot, but it was so packed people we had to abort without
even going into the sanctuary. Bummer. But that didn’t stop us! Oh
no! We returned to my house for dinner and adult libations. Thus
fortified, and after the crowds had abated, we returned to our
original target.

Sure enough there were very few people on the premises.
Unfortunately, the sanctuary was now locked. Double bummer. But that
didn’t stop us! Oh no! We found a nice fat target right there on the
church property; The Monsignor David K. Coleman Center (pictured).
There was a meeting going on in the main room, but the lobby had nice
big pictures just waiting for us to slide some fliers into their
frames (also pictured).

Feeling exhilarated by this minor success, we went back to the church
and noticed some beautiful statuary (also pictured). One of the
statues was a kneeling male figure in flowing robes with his hands
holding a basket formed into a DVD holder. How could we pass up the
opportunity? We couldn’t. I quickly filled up the display with a
single copy of the ever popular and delightful “The God Who Wasn’t
There” (again, carefully pictured).

Feeling the rush of success, my team and I left for a nearby place of
worship for my brother, and team member, to surreptitiously stash some
reason based materials in the heart of unreason. The only thing that
could top the high from our successful mission would be a signed DVD
to replace the brave soldier we left in enemy hands.

Pictures.